Anonymous

Growing up with a Christian faith, I often heard the story of the lost sheep. I have always been a believer, although the depth and practice of my faith varied in different life stages. As I neared 40, as a single woman who had always wanted a family, I faced the realisation that what I had always hoped and prayed for was not necessarily going to be my reality.

This brought grief and anger towards God, Jesus, and the concept of faith in general. I was so grief-stricken and angry that I barely prayed; I couldn't step foot in a church, and I began to see myself as someone who used to have faith but would not be able to sustain it for any longer.

This lasted for nearly a year. My testimony is simple - I didn't do anything at all during this period of time to make anything better. I was consumed with anger and grief....until I wasn't.

Quietly and gently, my darkness lifted, and after 10 months, I felt as though I could reach again for my faith. I had a deep sense of what can best be described as a voice saying gently, "It's ok. It's ok now."

Since that time, very little has changed in my life circumstances, but my faith has changed. It is a quieter faith, but it is steady, and it has been steady now for years.

The story of the lost sheep is now my story - I was lost, but Jesus came himself to find me. It still brings me to tears whenever I think of it.