Kat Manalo

Our love was born in a sacred space through ministry, mission, and friendship. Beb and I met while serving the Lord, our hearts drawn together by a shared love for Jesus and a passion to make Him known. It was pure, intentional, and rooted in something deeper than feelings or attraction.

From the beginning, it felt like God’s hand was writing something divine. We weren’t just partners in ministry. We became safe spaces for each other, soul-deep companions who carried one another’s burdens and dreams. Our bond was strengthened not in romance first, but in prayer, in worship, and in conversations about the Lord and His purpose for our lives.

What blossomed between us was a love I could only describe as Christ-centered and deeply spiritual. It felt sacred. And for a season, it felt like a gift straight from heaven. He was my one great love, a love that felt like it had been perfected in Christ’s unconditional love.

But then came the weight of reality. Beb was already in a complicated marriage, difficult, strained, and emotionally distant. Yet still, a marriage in the eyes of God. And that’s where our hearts broke. We knew the boundaries.

But, emotionally and spiritually, we had already crossed into something that we needed to lay at the feet of Jesus. We both love Jesus deeply. That’s what made it even harder. We weren’t running from Him. We were seeking Him together. And yet, the very One who brought us together was now asking us to surrender. We cried. We fasted. We prayed. We asked for clarity, for peace, for release.

And slowly, painfully, the Lord made it clear. We couldn’t walk forward in something that would cost us our obedience. We couldn’t build a future on someone else’s broken covenant. We couldn’t love each other more than we loved Jesus.

So we made the hardest choice of our lives. We chose Jesus. We let go not because there was no love, but because the love we shared was real. It was pure. And because it was pure, it could not stay where compromise would be required. It was a love too deep to dishonor God. It was a love willing to die to itself for the sake of righteousness.

Letting go was never a rejection of the love. It was the ultimate act of love, choosing holiness over happiness, obedience over desire, and surrender over control. As it says in Luke chapter 9 verse 23, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” This was our cross. And we carried it together, but also apart. Letting go felt like death. But it was also the beginning of a deeper kind of life.

Even now, I won’t deny the struggle. There are still days when the ache returns, when memories flash, when ‘what ifs’ linger, when silence feels heavier than words. But through every tear and every moment of longing, Jesus is near. He holds me. He walks with me. He continues to heal me from the inside out.

Healing isn’t always instant. It’s a process. It’s daily surrender. It’s letting God peel back the layers of brokenness and unmet longing and replacing them with peace, not the kind that comes from getting what I want, but the kind that comes from trusting that God knows better. Psalm 147 verse 3 says, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” And that is what He’s doing in me, patiently, gently, faithfully.

This love story may not have ended in marriage. But it didn’t end in failure, either. It ended in surrender with great love. It ended at the feet of Jesus. And in that surrender, there is redemption.

We didn’t lose. We gained something greater. A deeper reverence for God’s holiness. A testimony that speaks of obedience, not just emotion. A love story that, while it didn’t continue, still points to Christ.

I still believe in love. I still believe God writes the best stories. And I believe that choosing Him, no matter the cost, will never be a mistake. I am not closing doors. He will always be the greatest love and a part of me. I choose to wait on the Lord with hope, not in sorrow. For I know that when we delight ourselves in Him, He will give us the desires of our hearts.

If the Lord would one day choose to honor our heart’s desire in His perfect time and in His perfect way, then may His will be done. Until then, I will continue to trust, to hope, and to rejoice in a love that was born through Him, shaped by Him, and surrendered back to Him. It is a beautiful love I will forever cherish and thank the Lord for, a love that came to be in His most special way. And if it is His will, it will be a love that endures to the ends of the earth.

As I wait, I hold on to our life verse from Acts 20 verse 24: “However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me… the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace.” This is the calling we both live for, and the mission that remains above all else. No matter where life takes us, our story continues to testify to His grace, His faithfulness, and the beauty of choosing Jesus above all by His Great and Unconditional Love… To God be alone the Glory!